I’d been through a pretty acrimonious relationship split.  It had brought home to me just how easy it was for deep love to turn to feelings of bitterness, even after 16 years.

I was 43 and had begun experiencing night sweats.  I put it down to the intense, often debilitating emotions, and I thought it might be menopause as well.  But we got through it, and never saw each other again.

Shortly afterwards, I was living happily in a little terraced house in Farnworth, Bolton, with a job I loved and neighbours that became friends very quickly.  I wasn’t wealthy, but I was self-sufficient and felt relaxed and content.

Yet, one morning, as I awoke, I felt a tinge, just a trace, of worry in the pit of my stomach.  I wondered what it could be because nothing in my life now was of concern.  I was happy.  But this continued each morning and as time went on, I even started to mention it to friends, who just changed the subject as soon as possible to something they were interested in!

As time went on and I got more comfortable with life, these early morning feelings of anxiety still grew until they really concerned me.  It just didn’t add up. 

If you know me, you’ll know that I came to eventually learn that this was a sign of falling oestrogen. And so, these feelings grew worse and worse until I pretty much changed my life again, and they eased, but I also learned that I had to put more effort into my self-care, which I did, ultimately.

We very often don’t recognise early symptoms as the beginning of perimenopause, and put it down to life, which can be stressful in many ways, but because I was, by then, in a peaceful place, I didn’t make the connection, not at that time.  I do believe, though, that the emotions I’d experienced only months before had put my body under pressure, physically and mentally, and, who knows, may have accelerated the symptoms I was now having.

The earlier and more we learn about the effects of fluctuating hormones, the more prepared we can be and A) quickly find help, and B) quickly up-scale our self-love.  Please.

I’m not a qualified clinician, dietician, or psychologist, or anything! I write based only on my own experiences, personal views, and research into menopause. Please always seek the advice of a professional. Jacky Wood

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