Self-kindness during menopause

During the years leading up to my menopause day (2 years after my final period), I was naïve and felt sorry for myself.

I was in an unhappy relationship, in a job I hated and doing absolutely nothing to help myself.  Well not at first anyway, and not nearly quickly enough.

When my perimenopause began, I was 43.  The reason I can identify that time is because I began to have night flushes which started while I was trying to leave a toxic relationship, and it was emotionally draining, as well as being somewhat scary at times.

I knew about menopause and what might happen, and so I wasn’t really surprised.  But what did surprise me was the intensity of the night sweats.  But considering the threatening experiences I was having, I look back now and understand why.

I’m not sorry for myself now at all and haven’t felt like that in many years!  I’m well over all that which taught me so much about myself and life in general, the reality of which I’d previously been oblivious to.

The point to all this is this.  When you know it’s arrived, prioritise YOU.  Your body is going to demand a great deal more from you than it did in the past and I would suggest learning as much as you can, and speaking to as many people as you can, about menopause and its many effects on you physically, mentally, emotionally and energetically.

It’ll be far more beneficial to begin the good habits early on so that you (and all those you live and work with!) get used to them. 

It’s vital to increase your self-awareness, your sleep, rest time, improve your diet, your self-care and your physical activities, if you can.  If a symptom’s getting worse, see a menopause specialist or someone with a special interest in menopause.  Don’t hesitate.  They’re there to help.

I’m not a qualified clinician, dietician, psychologist, or anything! I write based only on my own experiences, personal views, and research into menopause, and the fact that I want to help women. Please always seek the advice of a professional. Jacky Wood

Want to book a half-hour chat with me about your menopause? Go to to select a time and date. Let’s talk!

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